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Life with 4 under the age of 5

1K views 41 replies 19 participants last post by  SpeedieGTI 
#1 ·
We just welcomed Addison to our family January 23rd. On that day, the dynamic of our family changed more drastically than I ever expected. I spent the nine months prior to Addison's birth at home taking care of our three girls while I looked for work. I felt that I took on this role well and did a great job of juggling the need to clean, play with the girls, and run them around to all of their activities. Suddenly, I am now faced with a 5 year old (Chloe), 4 year old (Annalise), 16 month old (Jilliana), and 6 week old (Addison) and feel the panic slowly creep into my soul. Chloe and Annalise are such good girls and want desperately to help sometimes to a fault. Jilliana is pissed and wants to take out her aggression on the baby. People (mainly women) tell me that I should enjoy every minute because they will grow up all too soon. I secretly want to hold them under water. Just for a minute or so. Just until they panic a little. To be honest, there are moments where I hide in my closet while I hyperventilate.

Once I entered the realm of parenthood, I found a whole new world of judgmental jerks. I don't drive a new enough van, which means that my children are obviously not as safe as New Every Five Year dad. I don't feed my kids as healthy as the woman who I'm convinced has figured out a way to hypnotize her children. I must be a terrible parent because I can’t figure out how to calmly give them appropriate consequences in real time for every single act of terrorism that they so creatively devise.

Sometimes, I'm just so happy that I get to go to work. Just the other night, I made a horrible mistake making dinner and so we went to Chik-fil-a for a drive through meal. The next morning as I'm taking Chloe to School, I notice Jilliana eating a nugget that she hid away. Yeah, I'm that parent. I'm sure it will get easier. I'm sure I will build a tolerance. But that day isn't today. I need to ride... or work... or scream...

On the flip side, I do have the cutest kids in the world.

 
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#3 ·
You do have some cute kids man. I don't think I could handle that much responsibility. I'm happy in my current role of Crazy Uncle.

Enjoy that hair on your head, when they hit the preteen/teen age you'll be pulling it out :haha:
 
#5 ·
Wow man, congrats & good luck! We have 4 as well, but they're spaced a bit more (9, 6, 4, 1) ... which admittedly doesn't do much to alleviate the havoc that 4 children can wreak! Some (most) times you've just gotta love 'em and hope for the best. :)
 
#26 ·
Yeah, that's a whole different discussion. I got my snip last October at the VA. Yeah that's right, I trusted the jewels with the Veterans Administration. I'm pretty sure I am missing more than a few brain cells for picking that option. 5 months later and I still have intermittent pain in my left ball. You see, the procedure was done scapeless meaning that he felt for the spaghetti then punctured my boy butter producing sack making a hole the size of a pencil eraser. He then fished out the spaghetti and put the hemostats on that bad boy. Snip and slide the mess back into the bag. Right side went swimmingly (you see what I did right there?) then he went onto the left side. He snagged the spaghetti, punctured my beautiful yam bag and started to fish the spaghetti through the hole. I then heard the dreaded, "Oops" and I knew I was in a world of hurt. The idiot then had to go digging with his hemostats. Since then, I've had bouts of pain making every step feel like I just got kicked right in the baby maker.
 
#12 ·
Life with 4 under the age of 5...feel the panic slowly creep into my soul...
I respect your nerve for lasting this long before the panic set in.

One two year old here and twins with ETA in a bit under two months. I think 3 under the age of 3 is a good stop for me to step off this reproducing train on. Sign off the old nutsacks and exchange them for permanent worry-bags under my eyes.
 
#14 ·
Once I entered the realm of parenthood, I found a whole new world of judgmental jerks. I don't drive a new enough van, which means that my children are obviously not as safe as New Every Five Year dad. I don't feed my kids as healthy as the woman who I'm convinced has figured out a way to hypnotize her children. I must be a terrible parent because I can’t figure out how to calmly give them appropriate consequences in real time for every single act of terrorism that they so creatively devise.
Granted, I only have two kids (now 14 and 11), it was easier for me; but I did the Mr mom thing for 12 years, while most times for the last 15 years holding a full time job (last 2 years I started my own real career).....I feel your pain
do I regret it..... never.... I am proud of what "I" feel "I" have accomplished
I swear you just need to ignore that other shit....people are afraid of what does not fit the mold... I never fit it the mold of conventional parenthood and the looks people gave me and comments bothered me to a great deal... but I knew what I wanted to accomplish while being the "pillar" while raising my kids.... like I said no regrets
Only thing I would do different now is take just a bit more "me" time...
 
#15 ·
I would be the parent who spanks their child in public, then kicks the shit out of the person who dares to tell me I shouldnt spank my child. Therefore, I shouldnt have children.
 
#27 ·
Her nickname is MoJo. Sigh! I never looked at her that way until you pervs said something... She was 14 in '11. I'm scared for your soul Doug.
 
#22 ·
Just think... in eleven or twelve years you'll have five menstruating females in the house at one time, and they'll probably be all synced up. The majority of them teenagers!

Won't that be a barrel of fun?
 
#24 ·
Doug feels my creepy a lot.
 
#25 ·
Just when you think it can't get worse, Crash comes along and informs you that not only is the glass not half full, but it is stolen and contains a mix of horse semen, urine, laxative and viagra, right after you swallowed a mouthful...

Faark, am I glad that I am not the only dumbarse one! It seems there is someone dumber than I! I got 3 under 4, 2 girls and one hellian of a boy in the middle.
I feel your pain. As far as judgemental others go, I honestly don't give a flying f u c k about what other people think. I care about providing the best care and education for my children. And that means giving them smacking as required. I have noticed that the wench does sometimes get paranoid of what others think when she goes to mothers groups and play groups etc, and also on the mothering forums. I swear, there are some bitches (and I apologise to all canines that I have cruelly tarred and insulting by likening these insane nutjubs to) on there that make our former "forum heroes" such as Mike Loftin, Grenadier88 and of course Shane Liberty, all seem like great guys we want to socialise with and befriend. Psycho bitches that get upset, because some other woman on the internet had her baby earlier and on the due date that her gyno had given - ie How dare she have her baby on my Baby's due date!
My parenting is somewhat old school, but it evolves to adapt to the changes and developments of the little terrors. If they start getting complacent with being smacked, they get put outside and hosed down fully clothed, or put in a cold shower, and various other punishments that don't necessarily rely on smacking. The wench has pretty much made me enforcer of order, so it's usually a case of dispensing punishment once, and after that the mere threat of it is sufficient to bring obedience.
My philosophy, is that I'm not there to be their friend, I'm there to protect and teach them, and raise them to be functional, polite, respectful, independent thinking, individuals that can make productive input to society. If there's some time left over, maybe I can be their friend, but first and foremost I'm their parent. Oddly enough, when we do meet up with other families with similar aged kids, ours are generally the more well behaved and obedient ones.

With all that said, I am glad that I do get to go to work, as it DOES provide an excellent escape from them, and so I am eternally thankful that the wench is there to look after while I'm at work. 3 kids each 20 months apart probably wasn't the smartest thing on my part, but it keeps things interesting...
Oh and as far as preventing the procreation of more children, the saying goes: "Up the bum, means no babies" .
That said, I'm quite happy to have enough kids to start my own rugby team... or militia...
 
#32 ·
You're Popeye?
 
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